Progress is coming along nicely on a new state-of-the-art car wash along Seneca Turnpike-- the third car wash along a 1-mile stretch of road in New Hartford.

The completion of the new car wash -- located on the grounds of the former Zebb's Bar & Grill at 8428 Seneca Turnpike -- can't come soon enough, because the next nearest car wash is an insurmountable .3 miles away: Roger's Laser Wash, at 8477 Seneca Turnpike.

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And if by some chance an enormous dirt cloud engulfs your car pulling out of Roger's Laser Wash, well guess what? You're in luck, because Hoffman's Car Wash is located another .3 miles down the road... at 8541 Seneca Turnpike. 

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THAT'S THREE CAR WASHES IN A 1-MILE SPAN ON THE SAME ROAD

Man, what a time to be alive. 

I'm no math whiz... but that seems like a lot? Not sure if I would've made that building choice in Sim City. But I'm sure it makes a lot of sense to someone. That's why city planners get paid a lot more than radio DJs.

Apparently the "WE NEED MORE CAR WASHES!!!" voice became too loud to ignore. From every street corner in New Hartford, they shouted. I couldn't even roll down the car window without hearing the outcry. (And then I quickly rolled it back up, because I was going through a car wash.)

SEE ALSO: A LOVE LETTER TO ZEBB'S: THE ABANDONED EATERY 3 YEARS LATER

Anyway, this is America, and we all have the right to make money the way we want. And I've seen enough Breaking Bad episodes to know that it's a perfectly honorable way to do that.

But do me a favor, New Hartford... if you see a dirty car along this stretch of Seneca Turnpike? Call the authorities. Something is wrong.

via GIPHY

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